Tuesday, March 30, 2010

300! well 301... (yay?)

post #301.

the previous [master] piece of dribble was #300. if i had known i wouldve put a wee bit more effort into that one. apologies in advance. as much as i love blogging via blogwriter on me iphone, i lose access to how many total posts i have. tragedy.

so this glorious milestone of a post that shouldve been very "pomp and circumstantial" is gonna be pretty blah. apologies in advance again for the lack of enthusiasm. its like watching a recording of a sporting event/game when you already know the result/score. especially when you know your [pathetic] team [mets] has already lost. whats the f*cking point?

guess they kinda created a word for that. killjoy.

that pretty much sums it up. happy 300 (well +1). woot. woot.

just felt like i rsvp'd for a wedding. wonderful. another example of a killjoy. marriage.

lol. again, apologies in advance. i just made myself chuckle.

guinness book of my blog records?

so the categories of "drunk" and "food" just got padded two fold today. I was a blogging maniac. think that was 5, well now 6 posts in like 1/2 hour.

¡en fuego!
(just found upside down exclamation mark on iphone. sooo stoked).

damn I'm good [2 fist pump/pound to chest]. celine dion eat your canadian heart out!

reasons why:

(a) I was determined not to end the month of march with the lowest blog post entries ever. the 9 of november 2009 was pathetic enough. we don't need a repeat.

(b) when you get me a chattin and discussin one of a few of my favorite things (booze) it's like diarrhea and upchuck of thoughts and words. like seriously neverending stream of flow.

(c) I couldve kept goin if I found more hello kitty booze. however to no avail that's all I could find.

ok the end. i've literally hit a blog brick wall. my brain hurts. peace out. you may hear from me again in march, or not.

if not, see ya'lls in april.

ps: does the guinness brewery own the guinness book of world records? or just purely coinkidink? hmmm...

hello kitty angel "a" white wine

and where theres a devil, theres an angel.

its just human nature, or I guess what you call your conscious. mine seems to be the color red 99.8% of the time. even tho I was named after the heavenly angels, ive definitely not held up the (high holy) standards to my namesake. sorry mom.

I blame booze.

click for more info: hello kitty angel white wine

hello kitty devil "sexy" red wine

and for that naughty devil-ish hello kitty in you. try some seductive deep red wine.

im like chuckling while trying to tap my inner hello kitty sexy while trying to write that above sentence. horrible. gosh, I suck at writing sexy. im definitely not ever getting a job writing for harlequin romance novels. that’s fo sho.

maybe if I have a sip [or chug] of this wine, that may all change.

ps: you notice in all these hello kitty booze entries today, im like advocating for me to drink these liquors. for various reasons that will ultimately help me write more better/improved content for this blog.

as you can see from that well formed sentence above, I cannot write/form a sentence (or thought) like a normal human being, sober.

click for more info: hello kitty devil red wine

hello kitty sweet pink "google" demi-sec

and the hits just keep on comin…

I like hit the gold (or pink) mine of hello kitty booze today. eesh.

so another pinky sweet delicate aromatic sparkling rose wine (is that what demi-sec is?) courtesy of our favorite pink kitty, hello.

thought: so it hello her 1st name and kitty her last name?
just food (or booze) for thought. I always wondered, but im too lazy to google the answer to that question now. im seriously all googled out in search for the existence of this kitty de hola booze.

sorry I just flipped it bilingual style. my bad. I sometimes get bored of just speaking just english. even tho I can barely speak it at times. even more barely if I end up pounding a couple cases of these sweet pink demi-secs.

click for more info: hello kitty sweet pink demi-sec

hello kitty "pinky" brut rose

I refuse to be played! so this crazy psycho was determined to find out if hello kitty actually did make booze. and they do! thru the magic of google-ing I found that they make some sorta pink [shocker] champagne-y sparkling hello kitty brut rose. ah-mazing.

im bit shocked that little pink miss hello kitty’s image is slapped on a bottle of booze. at least its on a classy kinda booze that you’d in stemware, champagne.

imagine hello kitty malt liquor 40’s? that will be the day. even better if the beer was colored pink. you heard it here 1st folks. I get copyright rights if they end up flying with my hello kitty 40’s idea.

click for more info: hello kitty brut rose

hello kitty wine bottle "booze" style folding umbrella

its like you hand me this pink bottle. im like cool, sanrio got smart and decided to liquorize the most girlie of childhood characters since betty boop (dee doop). smart. way to get young girls drinking early. at least we’re startin the young chickies on wine, and not sh!t @ss beer a la nattie ice, pbr, molson ice, milwaukee beast, keystone light, modelo, st. ides, old e…I mean I can keep goin for days. classy…

I mean you can seriously they make almost everything hello kitty. toasters, sewing machines, condoms? <------- (reference needed)…

but my “adult” mind thinks, this cant be a wine bottle. its got hello kitty on it. its like selling dora the explorer wine, not happening.

yes. ive been had. it’s a f*cking umbrella! genius ruse sanrio. well played. you’ve managed to trick the biggest of alcoholics.

that or the liver damaged has traveled to the brain and im just getting slow as a result. yep. that’s it.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

crane cool mist "zoo" humidifier

i need one of these right about now. if I didn't have a mouth, I'd die of asphyxiation. snot literally running down like my stoopid leaky faucet. I'm f*cking miserable. I can't breathe. make it stop!

this game tonite literally the only thing keeping me alive today. for reals yo.

ps: funny visual. me breathing into a duck sitting at my desk at work. not to out of the ordinary compared to the sh!t that usually goes down here in this zoo. literally zoo. I got a loud parakeet sitting next to me that won't shut the f*ck up. see. zoo.

click for more info: crane cool mist humidifier

nike syracuse orange 2010 ncaa basketball tournament sweet 16 "jacked up" tee

sweet 16. two years in a row…

this year hopefully will be a much better outcome. how about a national championship? I’ll give that one big hell yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah!

filling out my bracket this year pretty much caused an ulcer in my stomach with all the pressure I was in to guide syracuse to the finals in the most practical way (according to my expert college basketball analysis and knowledge). so, far not bad. with all the land mines [upsets] that exploded during this already awesome tournament, im not in such bad shape. I have 9 out of 16 teams still in it.

health wise, dude im all jacked up. I got the march madness swine flu, almost bleeding ulcer, oh and a burst blood vessel in my eye, that has yet to fully heal after 2 weeks. however, I will sacrifice my mind, body and soul, just as long as cuse wins the national championship,

so of course I picked the cuse to win this year in my bracket (shocker). then, had them facing west virginia in the finals. even better, the tie breaking score I used was the final score of the 2003 ncaa national championship game when cuse beat the Kansas jayhawks 81 – 78. magical. just a magical day that was, april 7, 2003.

im hoping to rub some good juju to this years team. anything less than a national championship for me would be devastating.

gooooo cuse!!

ps: for all you bandwagon jumpers. try to jump my orangmen bandwagon. I dare you [glare].

feels good to be [sweet] 16 again...

today is the day the mighty orange do battle with the butler pugdogs in the ncaa sweet 16. the victor of this sweet battle wins 1 of 8 bids to the elite 8. its sooo sweet to be elite.

march madness is literally the only reason for my deadbeat parent absence from this blog all month. ive literally been consumed by everything syracuse (regular season, big east tournament devastation, ncaa tournament run) that ive driven myself to illness. yes folks, I got sick with the flu, aka “ the march madness swine flu”. literally have snot clogged up to my brain and partially deaf in my right ear due to the numerous attempts in unclogging the mountainous amounts of snot. think I pooped an ear drum. yo, for reals…

with that lovely description of my bodily functions/fluids said, I march on like a strong (and stooped) orange soldier and cheer on my orangemen tonight at 7:07pm tip off at the east end bar and grill on the upper east side of manhattan (conveniently 5 blocks from my apt, so I can stumble/crawl home) . here, where I will be self medicating this “the march madness swine flu” with shots of jaeger (I mean it tastes like nyquil, must be medicinal) and bud lights. I figure, alcohol in general helps kill off bacteria. perfect remedy to my illness. :D

the cold meds are quelling my real excitement for this game tonight (damn you debbie downers dayquil). but for reals I cannot be more tickled [orange] excited in anticipation of this game. it seriously feels like my wedding day. im all nervous/excited/anxious, just makes me puke.

goooooooooooo cuse. I cannot be more prouder of my boyz.
[shed an orange tear]…

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

nike new york yankees st. patricks day "experimental" track jacket

it’s a friggin miracle im not drunk yet.

against better judgement, I forgo-ed the invitation from my local bar for kegs and eggs this morn and marched straight to work, like a good non-irish.

however, i wondered the other day how absolutely hi-larious it would be for me to blog to you folks drunk? I mean ive never tried it. been hungover (many many many of times), but never ever drunk. today actually would’ve been a good day to test this “science experiment”.

oh well. I apparently grew a brain and found the ability to make “good judgements” during my sleep last nite.

as much as it pains (and literally kills, like murder me) to blog anything with the word yankee, I found this pretty dope @ss jacket from nike in celebration of st. patty’s day. cannot find in mets version (figures. since the yankees rule the universe pish).

however (light bulb) I can take a mets patch, dip it in some green dye or better yet smash a lephrechan on it and slap it on top of the yankee logo. problemo solved.

but. since today is st. pattys day and you need to be nice to your fellow irish and especially leprechans, I’ll try this “science experiment” with me lil leprechaun next week…

theyre always after me lucky charms!

happy st pattys day f*ckers!

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

lacie imakey 8gb "geeky" flash drive

30 lashes to my wrist for being a deliquent blogger this month. 1/2 of it I've spent out of the good ole u s of a, 3/4 of it I've been in a druken haze and 7/8 of it I've spent recovering from horrid torrid hangovers. lets just say it's been a peachy march.

anywho. I'm sure y'alls been dying to get into deeper shopping debt during my somewhat sabbatical this month. so without further ado, let the spending resume...

so when this techie geek [me] gets in that frame of mind where I need to soup up my computer with all these useless gid gadgets, I literally go buck @ss wild and buy all of best buy's inventory and all it's subsidiaries' inventories. thank god for the best buy credit card.

ive been a huntin for a coolio flash drive. I mean they make em in all ship shape sizes and colors. but how more ingenious than one in the shape of a key? perfect size to add to your keychain and also to help hide the fact you carry around a flash drive with you all the time [geek].

I mean if I bought one the shape of a swarovski rhinestoned out pink pig, not only am I a super nerd carrying (and literally flashin) my flash drive 24/7, but also the fact I got one shaped as a blinged out piece of future bacon.

listen. it's hard for me to be subtle in any sorta which way in life. but maskin my nerdy-ness does take priority.

I rather be a dork than a nerd.

priorities people. priorities.

click for more info: lacie imakey 8gb flash drive

Friday, March 12, 2010

free people slouch "crocs" clog

apparently people do read my blog. amazeballs.

evidence that human beings do tune in and read is: i've been m.i.a. for last couple weeks (vaca in cancun, drunken trips to upstate ny to watch nova/cuse game). and apparently people noticed and felt compelled enough to email me and point out I haven't posted at all in the month of march. gosh whatta slacker.

I wanted to take this opportunity to thank those who've helped light a match under my @ss and got me to post today. especially since I'm still licking my gaping wounds after the devastating loss by my cuse yesterday at the big east tournament. bru-tal.

so, speaking of brutal. clogs are back according to the house of chanel. mr. karl lagerfeld slapped some high heeled clogs on those stick figure models [and bottles] in his most recent paris fashion show. wonderful.

so free people followed suit and created these cloggy boots. which. I kinda like.

I consider clogs being a more formal/dressy version of crocs. feel free to be amazeballed by this my epiphany of they day.

ok. I'm done talking. still miserable (and hungover) from yesterdays debacle. and the typical "boy" in me just does not wanna talk about it anymore.

click for more info: free people slouch clogs